I realize now that I probably didn't feel a foreboding something when I awoke to a surprising amount of sunshine last week, I didn't but I wish I had -- if I had I may have sent Dan to get Jane. I did feel it was rather odd the Jane was not up. It was already 9:00. I heard her a few minutes later so I went in to pick her up. As I opened the door I was acosted by a fairly severe stench. When the door was no longer blocking my view (it had long ceased to block my sense of smell) I saw what I'm sure will someday be a funny memory: Jane laying despondently face down in a pile of her own feces which also happened to be spread (and dried mind you) all over her crib ALL OVER. Becca will I'm sure know the first thoughts that came to my mind... and remained in my mind later as I attempted to stave off a panic attack "FECAL MATTER. FECAL MATTER EVERYWHERE"
Sadly this is not the end. The next day jane was eating her meal in her high chair. I left the room and returned to find she had thrown up blueberries all over the floor. No problem. Just puke and hey she didn't even get any on her shirt. Wait... she didn't get any on her shirt- or her face but she did get some on her pants. She's sitting in it.. that's... odd. Sniff Sniff...
Not puke.
Not puke at all.
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